Can you have happiness without love?

I’ve been thinking a lot about this question lately. My opinion is; no you cannot find true lasting happiness without love. This does not mean “love” in the sense of an intimate relationship with a life partner or spouse. Granted, loving someone and being loved can and does bring tremendous joy, happiness, and purpose to our lives, but it is not a requirement for happiness. We only need to think about monks or people of highly enlightened states who have found happiness within themselves. In this context I’m talking about love for oneself.

For years I was unhappy. Sure I seemed happy on the outside and thought I was happy, but I always felt as if something was missing in my life. Any happiness I experienced was short lived. My happiness mostly came from professional accomplishments or material possessions; they weren’t keys to happiness rather but distractions. My answer to how to find happiness or “how to be happy” was anything that distracted me from knowing my true self. Intimate relationships never lasted very long either, usually because I felt as if I was giving up something; like personal freedom or the pursuit of my dreams. I know, it’s backwards thinking. At least a way of thinking that’s bound to leave me lonely. [Read more…]